Saturday, May 12, 2007

I’ve been realizing recently that I still seem to be in the grip of the belief that I am a separate material entity in a universe of countless separate material entities. This belief must be a very powerful force, because it’s had me in its hold for most of my life, and still hasn’t appreciably loosened its grasp. At the bottom, underneath all my spiritual hopes and ideals, lies this stubbornly unshakable belief in the materiality of the universe. Unfortunately, it’s a conviction that has led me, day after day after day, into a no-win struggle to control everything. My reasoning has been that if the universe is made up of separate things and I am one of them, then I better try to control as much as possible. That’s been my basic belief, and it has created for me a life of never-ending labor. This morning I realize that I simply must overcome that belief if I want to find genuine contentment. Strangely, though, even that sentence suggests that I’m still burdened by the belief in materiality, for it implies the existence of a separate “I” that can “overcome” some material force. The truth is that the universe is a bottomless and boundless spiritual force, consisting not of separate “things” but only of one infinite power of which every supposed “thing” is an indivisible part. It’s an endless sky in which what is called “I” dwells as an inseparable, indistinguishable component, like a breeze in the infinite wind. If this truth could finally become clear, there would be no need to exercise control, because it would be obvious that there is no “thing” to control and no “thing” to do the controlling. There would just be the single supreme force that always controls itself in a perfectly harmonious manner. This force (or Force) has been given various names, such as God, Allah, and The Tao, but whatever its name, it’s the power that always does exactly what needs to be done. What’s especially wonderful about this is that it means “I” can – and must – relax, because there is actually no “I” to be gripped by any belief, and certainly no “I” that can do any controlling. There’s only the solitary, serene Universe that’s always managing everything in an utterly relaxed manner.

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