Monday, May 17, 2010
MY ONLY CHILD
I try to think of my “self” as my only child. This self, this little ego that I have created and raised inside me, is always a fearful and frail creature, calling out for protection and provision in this supposedly scary world. My “self” sees the world as a worrisome place, packed with perils and hazards all around. It runs scared all day and through most of the night. If it weren’t such a sad situation, it might be almost laughable, to think of this “thing” I’ve made making such a fearsome place out of a universe that, from some points of view, is a stunningly peaceable place. This is where I come in, the “father” of this only child I have created. I need to be a loving dad to this frightened little self. I need to comfort it when the perceived perils of the world seem to snarl around it. I need to hold it comfortingly in my awareness, accepting all its fears and concerns, consoling it with the truth that I am vast enough to hold not only it, but everything that could happen to it, in my reassuring arms.